Decaying.. maybe.


The cursor blinks at the blank screen. There are no words, not anymore to scribble across it. I just wish that I, too, could be a part of it. Void. Empty. Blank, without any labels, any thoughts, anything written across me. It’s one of those moments when your insides grow hollow and whatever falls into it, visions, words, voices – they become meaningless. Dreams without much lucidity. Thoughts that seem too vague even to be considered. And you sit there, motionless, unable even to discern this inactivity. Perhaps it’s just the ‘plasma state’ of our emotions where nothing is stable, nothing concrete – everything is just a haze of…well…everything.

I have wished, at times, for such indifference. But when it does come, it isn’t a very welcome state. Even when you are not exactly aware of this decrepitude that grows upon you, there is this subtle pain that stirs within; a soft tinge of regret, of not living up to your own self. It does persist, this feeling, but you are so given to lethargy that you can’t help consciously trying to look from it.
And so, I lie on the floor, folding papers and unfolding them; tearing them to pieces and blowing them into the air. They feel like snowflakes, landing gently on the palm of my hand. And then they dissolve away.

16 love for me ..:

☆ Rià ღ said...

I love the pic its so surreal...

Ezazi said...

WOW.

The way you write. It's breathtaking at times, did anyone ever tell you that?

If nobody did, then here goes:

The way you write is breathtaking.

Don't ever stop. And believe that you're special.

Cause you are.

*envelopes you in a warm hug*

ateeq mughal said...

u have been awarded at my blog, :D, get it:
www.amdoingwell.blogspot.com

Ovais said...

You're making me think.

Deep, deep, deep post :o

~Serendipity~ said...

With the pen poised in the air, and not knowing what to write, a writer always has these empty moments.
You portrayed them so well :)

there is this subtle pain that stirs within; a soft tinge of regret, of not living up to your own self

Loved these lines :)

Love :)

Mohammed Saqlain said...

Wow , I wish i could write that well !
LOVELY post :)
Wish to see u at my blog too :)

ateeq mughal said...

man!!!!!!!!!! if u continue with this thing u can write a bestseller.. :D
seriously!!!!
it was the perfect start..
OMG....U HAVE GOT REAL EMOTIONS DISSOLVED IN UR WORDS :D

ateeq mughal said...

AM SO LOVING THIS POST, JUST READ IT FOR THE THIRD TIME..
U SHOULD REALLY START WRITING A NOVEL....
IT WOULD BE REALLY A BESTSELLER

WarmSunshine said...

Awwww.... I hope you feel better...

http://www.myperfectline.com/2011/08/some-thoughts-to-live-by-it-is-so-easy.html

Don't want to look as if I'm spamming or something... but read this one... i hope you feel better!

Blasphemous Aesthete said...

You still manage to weave beauty when you say that you don't.

It's like, 'you say it best, when you say nothing at all.' :)


Cheers,
Blasphemous Aesthete

Raj said...

you stare onto the paper willing the mind to act. you start. and then you pause. *tear paper*.

*new page*

stare in between the lines. stare at the fold on the top right corner. then your eyes look around for inspiration. you find walls. literally and even otherwise.

peace at last. peace without solace.

Raj said...

one question and one question only.

do you feel what you write when you do or have you felt and hence you can write?

Estell said...

I am so angry :[ For some reason I never get your updates on my feed thingy. WHYYY? I'm missing alot

Sh@s said...

Lost in the description...loved it :)

Ezazi said...

AWARDED YOU ON MY BLOG.
GO CHECK.
CHEERS!

Imperfect said...

Beautiful. I loved this post. I can feel myself in this post. I have had this feeling so many times, you have captured it well.

Behind the curtain..

My photo
I believe that it's the ordinary that is so distinguished. I am only an amateur who sees the mundane with a twist. Goes around putting titles on self-perceived moments as life goes on by...
 

Masquerades..

“I can read women. But god damn you woman, you’re all over the place. If I could read you I’d be god” -David Flecha

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I believe that it's the ordinary that is so distinguished. I am only an amateur who sees the mundane with a twist. Goes around putting titles on self-perceived moments as life goes on by...